Creative Writing - The Burning Village
Last week we did some creative writing.
Before the Mackintosh clan came it was a peaceful and lovely day. I was sharpening my axe when they came and they just started burning everything. Everyone in our clan Cameron was running everywhere like the bones of dead bodies torn from one another by wolves, after a battle. I grabbed my axe and ran towards the mountain Mam Sodhail and a few people from my clan just came running after me. When we reached MT Mam Sodhail I could hear Angus Mackintosh yelling “Come back here ya wimps.” Then a rustling sound came from some of the bushes. Our clan leader Donald Walter Cameron said “Hopefully it was an animal.” “Yar” I said doubtfully. Then an arrow came towards us and shot Donald. “Dad!” I yelled “Son go without me.” he said with some of his last breath. “No I won't leave without you” I said crying. “Run go, run” he said as he passed away. “There is nothing we can do for him” said the healer David. Out of the darkness an arrow came shooting at my arm. “Ah you ****** **** I will get you, you *****” I yelled as I screamed in pain. Soon we ran from the place where we were deeper onto Mount Mam Sodhail. The person followed in the distance. Finally you could make out a shadow. You could tell it was a girl from her long hair. Then she started getting closer and closer. Then she finally spoke “I’m so sorry I thought you were an animal. I’m really sorry.” “You killed my father, sorry isn’t going to bring him back” I said. “What he is trying to say is he's not going to forgive you but he wants to know who you are” said David. “I’m Hope daughter of Quiva” she said “You mean you're the daughter of Quiva the god Quiva” said one of the civilians. She paused for a second and then said “Yes. I want to know who you are” she said pointing at me. “Allan Cameron son of Donald Cameron and the Irisa goddess Areecc. ” I said she paused and said “We are both Demigods, that means you're welcome at my camp.” I thought about it then said “If my civilians are not welcome, I will not go.” She stopped for a minute then said “Fine they can come.”
One year later…
It's been 1-year since father died. God’s came and gone. The Buchanan clan has helped us with supplies like food, water etc.
I really enjoyed it I wish I could finish it.
I really enjoyed doing this writing I wish could continue the writing.
Before the Mackintosh clan came it was a peaceful and lovely day. I was sharpening my axe when they came and they just started burning everything. Everyone in our clan Cameron was running everywhere like the bones of dead bodies torn from one another by wolves, after a battle. I grabbed my axe and ran towards the mountain Mam Sodhail and a few people from my clan just came running after me. When we reached MT Mam Sodhail I could hear Angus Mackintosh yelling “Come back here ya wimps.” Then a rustling sound came from some of the bushes. Our clan leader Donald Walter Cameron said “Hopefully it was an animal.” “Yar” I said doubtfully. Then an arrow came towards us and shot Donald. “Dad!” I yelled “Son go without me.” he said with some of his last breath. “No I won't leave without you” I said crying. “Run go, run” he said as he passed away. “There is nothing we can do for him” said the healer David. Out of the darkness an arrow came shooting at my arm. “Ah you ****** **** I will get you, you *****” I yelled as I screamed in pain. Soon we ran from the place where we were deeper onto Mount Mam Sodhail. The person followed in the distance. Finally you could make out a shadow. You could tell it was a girl from her long hair. Then she started getting closer and closer. Then she finally spoke “I’m so sorry I thought you were an animal. I’m really sorry.” “You killed my father, sorry isn’t going to bring him back” I said. “What he is trying to say is he's not going to forgive you but he wants to know who you are” said David. “I’m Hope daughter of Quiva” she said “You mean you're the daughter of Quiva the god Quiva” said one of the civilians. She paused for a second and then said “Yes. I want to know who you are” she said pointing at me. “Allan Cameron son of Donald Cameron and the Irisa goddess Areecc. ” I said she paused and said “We are both Demigods, that means you're welcome at my camp.” I thought about it then said “If my civilians are not welcome, I will not go.” She stopped for a minute then said “Fine they can come.”
One year later…
It's been 1-year since father died. God’s came and gone. The Buchanan clan has helped us with supplies like food, water etc.
I really enjoyed it I wish I could finish it.
I really enjoyed doing this writing I wish could continue the writing.
I loved reading this piece Rylan. I could tell you were really motivated with it. You worked hard and came up with some great dialogue. I love how you gave the characters accents. By doing this you gave the reader information about the setting and people without havig to say it directly. Where do you think you could place some paragraph breaks? Where are there changes in the place or events?
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